Trust is the foundation of any strong and healthy relationship, whether with family, good friends, colleagues, or a romantic partner. Unfortunately, when trust is broken in a relationship, both individuals can feel hurt, confused, and unsure of what to do next. Even though rebuilding trust takes time, effort, and a willingness to move forward, it is possible.

The first step to rebuilding trust is deciding if the relationship is important enough. While not every relationship can be repaired, many can be with hard work, compassion, and empathy. This includes whether someone will decide to forgive and work toward healing.

Rebuilding trust can seem daunting, especially after a betrayal, but it’s possible if both parties are committed to the process. No matter who your breach of trust is with, there are steps you can take to heal and reconnect.

If you or someone you know is experiencing issues with trust in any type of relationship, we are here to help. Text CONNECT to 741741 for free, confidential mental health support. You can chat with a live volunteer Crisis Counselor, 24/7.

How long does it take to rebuild trust once it’s been lost?

There’s no set timeline for rebuilding trust. The process depends on the situation, the people involved, and the severity of the breach. For example, trust broken by a small misunderstanding may take less time to rebuild than trust lost due to infidelity or repeated dishonesty.

The healing process also depends on emotional readiness, personal willingness, and history. Some people may take longer to process their feelings and decide whether to trust again. Every relationship has its own pace for healing and regaining trust.

Rather than focusing on how long the healing process might take, you could reflect on what it would take to feel secure in the relationship. You can ask questions like:

• What would it take for me to feel safe with this person again?
• Would an open conversation help?
• What steps are necessary for me to build trust in this relationship?
• Do I need to see consistent actions over time, or will a simple apology work?

Understanding your emotions, needs, and what it takes for you to feel safe again is crucial in deciding whether trust can be rebuilt.

Steps to rebuilding trust

The journey to rebuilding trust is very personal and looks different for everyone, but it’s important to remember that it cannot be rushed. Taking intentional, steady steps can restore a sense of safety and security in the relationship:

Acknowledge the betrayal

Before trust can be rebuilt, the betrayal or breach must be acknowledged. Both parties should recognize what happened and how it impacted the relationship. Whether it was lying in a friendship, infidelity in a romantic partnership, or broken promises at work or within a family, avoiding the issue will delay the healing process.

Allow time for healing

Often, trust cannot be restored overnight. Both people must process their emotions and decide if they’re ready to move forward. For instance, if a partner has been unfaithful, the person who was hurt may need time to process the loss of the relationship they believed they had. Similarly, if a friend shares that they feel betrayed, the other person may need distance before reconnecting. Taking this time allows for genuine healing rather than forcing a resolution too soon. Rushing the healing process can lead to more unresolved issues and lingering resentment.

Communicate openly and honestly

Open and honest communication is essential in rebuilding trust. Expressing emotions, setting expectations, and discussing concerns openly can help repair the connection. For example, if trust was broken due to dishonesty, both people should be willing to share their thoughts and feelings without fear of judgment. When you feel safe enough to discuss the betrayal of trust, you’ll be better positioned to work through it with the other person.

Show consistency and reliability

The key to rebuilding trust is consistently demonstrating honesty, dependability, and follow-through with actions. For example, if a partner lied in the past, showing through daily actions that they are now transparent and accountable can gradually restore trust. If trust issues have developed over time, addressing them with honesty and consistency can help restore a sense of security.

Practice empathy and understanding

When trust is being questioned, or a breach has occurred, both people need to work to understand each other’s perspectives. Empathy can build trust by showing that feelings are valid and respected. If a family member breaks your trust, try to see things from their view while still honoring your values and emotions. Likewise, if you’ve hurt someone, acknowledging their pain without defensiveness can help rebuild your relationship.

Set boundaries and expectations

Clear boundaries and expectations create a healthier foundation for trust. Whether with a friend or family member, establishing what is and is not acceptable behavior moving forward is beneficial to long-term, strong relationships. Be transparent about what’s needed to also build trust and respect between one another.

Seek professional help if needed

Sometimes, rebuilding trust requires outside support. Individual therapy, couples therapy, or family counseling can guide those struggling to move forward. If the betrayal involves deeper issues, like repeated dishonesty or long-standing conflicts, a therapist can help both people work through their emotions and develop strategies to rebuild their bond.

Crisis Text Line is a helpful and confidential resource if you or anyone you know needs someone to talk to  about issues related to trust or relationships. Text CONNECT to 741741 to chat with a live volunteer Crisis Counselor 24/7

Be patient and allow trust to grow

Remember, healing takes time. Trust cannot be demanded; it must be nurtured after a betrayal. Rather than expecting things to return to how they were immediately, focus on making small, consistent efforts to rebuild the relationship. In cases of infidelity or repeated breaches, professional help may be necessary to guide both individuals through the difficult processes of rebuilding trust. Patience, understanding and a commitment to growth will lead to stronger relationships.

While these steps offer a guide to help rebuild broken trust, each relationship’s pace will differ based on individual circumstances and dynamics.

Rebuilding trust after it has been broken isn’t easy, but it’s possible with the right mindset, effort, patience, and resources. It’s okay to feel uncertain or hurt as many common relationship issues can arise. What matters is choosing the path that feels right for you. Whether trust has been broken between family members, friends, a romantic partner, or a colleague, restoring it will require a commitment to communication, healing, and empathy. With intention and hard work, trust can grow back or strengthen.

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If you’re struggling with a betrayal of trust, you’re not alone. Our relationship resources offer additional insights on trust and how you can learn more about how to navigate relationship issues to build healthy connections. Crisis Text Line is free, confidential and available 24/7 to help. Text CONNECT to 741741 when you’re ready to take the first step to navigating relationship challenges.