Stories from the Crisis Text Line Community
Bethany – Finding Strength and Purpose from Loss
The grief experienced from losing a loved one can be devastating and at times feel impossible to overcome. For Crisis Text Line’s Community & Content Manager, Bethany Gormley, being 9 and losing her mom to breast cancer left her battling depression and grief for years. However, as Bethany shares in her story below, despite continuing to grieve, she has found strength and purpose in helping others get through their darkest moments.
Bethany’s story:
I was 9 years old when my dad told me that my mom was dying. I had just got off the school bus, and it was a warm September day in North Carolina. My mom had been in hospice care for the past several weeks – tragically, she had been battling breast cancer for years. Because of my age, I didn’t really understand the gravity of the situation.
As you can imagine, I was devastated when my mom died. I knew she had been sick, but I didn’t fully grasp that it was terminal. I thought she would get better. For years and years since her passing, I grieved (and continue to do so).
I’ve learned a lot about grief and bereavement since then, which I think has helped shape me into the human I am, and the clinical social worker I eventually came to be. I love working with people and supporting them during life’s hardest transitional moments.
Despite the painful years of grief, anxiety and depression that followed (and many years of therapy) I am who I am today because of what I went through, which I think is powerful. I’d like to think I was given a gift of sorts – one that allows me to work closely, on an acute emotional level, with individuals who have experienced pain and suffering in some capacity.
I don’t shy away from uncomfortable topics. I lean into them, the way I wish someone had done for me when my mom was initially diagnosed with cancer back in 2001. Talking to a child about their dying parent sounds like an impossible task, but there are many excellent and developmentally appropriate tools available now to support caregivers in navigating those conversations.
Going through something as traumatic as losing a parent at a young age must lead to some kind of growth, right? If you’re out there and you’re struggling right now, my hope is that this pain somehow makes sense one day. I hope things work out for you and that you’re able to use your pain to shape your life into something beautiful. That doesn’t make the loss any less painful or real.
I miss my mom desperately each and every day, even as a 31 year old woman. But I find solace in thinking that what I went through helped shape me into someone that is able to support others in their darkest moments. Working in the mental health field and at Crisis Text Line feels full circle for me. ♥️
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If you are struggling and need to reach out to someone, Crisis Text Line is here for you. Text CONNECT to 741741 to reach a live volunteer Crisis Counselor. Free, confidential, 24/7.
Interested in sharing your story too? Each month, we will be posting stories from our community to help inspire and connect with others who may be going through similar experiences. Submit your story today! It can make a big difference in helping others feel seen, validated, and less alone.
